The Journey From Anxiety to Healing

Personal Perspective: If you're struggling, remember that you're not alone.

Approximately 1 in 5 Americans—20 percent of the population, 46 million adults and children—are living with a mental illness or disorder. Nearly 30 percent of Americans experience having anxiety disorder at some point in their life. Globally, 5 percent of adults suffer from depression. These aren't just statistics; they're real people—our friends, coworkers, partners, and maybe even us.

It’s important that we continue to raise awareness about mental health, particularly during Mental Health Awareness Month, to remove stigma, offer support, and share resources. But it’s also important to share stories, because stories connect us. They remind us that we are not alone in our struggles, and we can find healing through connection and understanding.

In my own life, anxiety has been a constant companion, but it hasn’t defined me. I’ve learned to live with it, not as a permanent state, but as an experience that I can witness and let go of. My journey with anxiety has shown me the power of emotional regulation, mindfulness, and connection, and I hope that by sharing it with you, it can help you on your path to healing as well.

My Battle With Anxiety: From Struggle to Awareness

Anxiety was something I never truly understood until it took over my life during my time in grad school. At the time, I couldn’t focus, couldn’t sleep, and felt trapped in a constant web of worry and fear. I thought I was my anxiety. It was all-consuming. It clouded my thoughts, my relationships, and my day-to-day life. My anxiety was a response to feelings of feeling unsafe due to trauma. Through the practice of meditation, I learned to process and witness my emotions and become grounded in presence. That anxiety was an experience and was not me.

Over time, I learned an important lesson: I am not my anxiety. Anxiety, like all emotions, is an experience; it’s not me. And the most powerful realization I’ve had is that all experiences are impermanent. That includes anxiety. It moves through me, but it doesn’t define me.

I started witnessing my anxiety rather than identifying with it. I began to see it for what it was—a fleeting experience, a moment that I could choose not to attach to. I began to ask myself, "What’s triggering this? What’s causing this feeling?" And slowly, I learned how to remove myself from situations or triggers that would escalate my anxiety.

Here’s one practice I found helpful: Writing down my triggers.

When I identified my triggers—whether it was certain situations, thoughts, or even the stories I was telling myself—I could then notice the patterns. Once I could see when my anxiety would arise, I had more control over how I responded. I even learned phrases like "I need a moment to regroup" or "I’ll be back in a bit" to help me gracefully exit situations where my anxiety was triggered.

It wasn’t about avoiding the emotions—it was about learning how to be with them and let them pass. That’s the power of emotional regulation.

Emotional Regulation: The Power of Being an Emotion Detective

One of the tools that has made a world of difference in my emotional health is learning to be an emotion detective. When we start to investigate the emotions we’re experiencing, we can stop reacting blindly and begin to understand what's really going on.

For instance, when I feel triggered or overwhelmed, I ask myself:

• What emotion am I feeling right now?

• What just happened around me to spark this emotion?

• What need is driving this emotion that hasn’t been met?

  
  

By identifying the root of the feeling, we can begin to regulate our emotional responses. It’s not about suppressing or ignoring our emotions; it’s about being with them, understanding them, and making conscious decisions about how to respond.

This process is part of developing emotional intelligence (EQ). Emotional intelligence is about understanding and managing our own emotions—and the emotions of others. It involves:

1. Self-awareness—recognizing our emotions without judgment

   
   

2. Self-regulation—finding balance and adapting to our emotions and circumstances

   
   

3. Social skills—managing relationships and interacting with others

   
   

4. Empathy—understanding and considering others' feelings and perspectives

   
   

5. Motivation—knowing what drives our behaviors and actions

The ABCs of emotional intelligence are simple but profound:

• Awareness: Recognize your emotions without judgment.

• Balance: Find equilibrium by accurately naming and embracing emotions as they are.

• Compassion: Meet your emotions with kindness and understanding.

  
  

These practices allow us to understand the full spectrum of our emotions, which helps us make better decisions, form more authentic relationships, and navigate life with greater emotional resilience.

Removing the Stigma Around Mental Health

One of the biggest challenges many of us face in managing our mental health is stigma. Often, mental health struggles are invisible. When someone suffers from a broken leg, it’s easy to offer support. But when someone is struggling with anxiety, depression, or any other mental illness, the pain isn’t as visible, and that can make it harder for others to offer the same kind of help.

It’s important to remember that mental illness is not a reflection of someone's worth or strength. It’s a condition, not an identity. So, when someone is struggling, it’s crucial not to take their behaviors personally. We don’t always know the battles people are fighting, but we can extend compassion, understanding, and support.

Let’s all be the first to extend the olive branch. Reach out to someone who might be struggling. Offer a hand. Say, “I see you. You’re not alone.”

Healing Through Connection

One of the most significant factors contributing to mental health challenges is social isolation. Feeling disconnected from others can amplify feelings of loneliness, anxiety, and depression. Connection—even in small ways—can be a powerful antidote.

Studies have shown that people who have at least three or more meaningful social connections have an increased sense of purpose and longevity. In a world that often prioritizes individual success, the simple act of connecting with others can have profound effects on our mental and emotional health.

It doesn’t have to be a grand gesture. Start small: Send a text to a friend, join a club, attend a group activity, or even just smile at a stranger. Healing comes from those moments of human connection, no matter how simple.

Practices That Help

Meditation has been one of the most transformative practices in my mental health journey. During my years in graduate school, when anxiety was at its peak, meditation gave me a sense of relief I couldn’t find anywhere else. It allowed me to pause, breathe, and witness my thoughts without attaching to them.

I started meditating for just 15 minutes a day, right after I woke up. Over time, it gave me more space to be present in my experiences, without letting anxiety take over. Studies have shown that meditation has profound benefits for mental health: Over 16,500 papers document its positive effects on reducing stress and anxiety.

Sleep has also been a game-changer for me. When I don’t sleep well, I feel foggy, irritable, and ungrounded. When I prioritize sleep and get a full eight hours, I feel more present, more positive, and better able to handle whatever life throws my way. Sleep is when our brain heals and regenerates. So, protect your sleep; it’s just as important as any other form of self-care.

Lastly, laughter has been a surprising ally in my journey. It’s not just fun, it’s healing. Laughter activates the same brain waves as meditation, helping us release stress and shift our mindset. When life feels heavy, I turn to laughter. It’s a reminder that we can find lightness even in the darkest moments.

Embrace Your Journey

You are not your diagnosis.

You are not your past.

You are not your anxiety, depression, or any label that has been placed on you.

You are a whole, worthy human being, and you are not alone.

Let’s continue to break down the stigma around mental health. Let’s normalize the conversation, offer compassion to ourselves and others, and remind everyone that healing is possible.

Nicole Tetreault, Ph.D. - Website - Blog -