Through a Glass, Darkly: Fighting Depression’s Negativity

Personal Perspective: The negative bias that accompanies depression can be addressed.

Key points

• A bias toward negativity is a clinical marker of depression.

• This may result in increased complaining, which can impede social functioning.

• Conscious positivity can help balance out unwanted negativity bias.

Woman looking out the window

I’ve battled severe depression for as long as I can remember, all the way back to the allegedly sunny days of my childhood. Thanks to meds and therapy and supportive friends and a host of other resources, I don’t suffer now the way I used to. I can safely say I’m actively in recovery.

But I can’t say I remain untouched. Years of depression have clearly left their mark on me—most notably in the negativity I carry around with me like a security blanket.

Numerous boyfriends along the way have called me out on my frequent observations about both the major and the minuscule deficits of life. “Terri, do you always have to see the downside of everything?” they’ve asked. Fortunately, some of my complaining passes as black humor, which has helped me salvage my relationships.

But I’ll be the first to admit that I do see through a glass, darkly. It feels so engrained in me, this mindset, that I don’t know what to do about it. I don’t want to bring other people—or myself, for that matter—down; but my negative interpretations of life seem to pervade my reasoning no matter how hard I try to fight them.

I know I’m not alone in this. In fact, one clinical journal rather poetically referred to this so-called “negative interpretation bias” as “both a clinical marker and a scar of depression.” Behavior Research and Therapy, Volume 163, 104276 (2023). This makes perfect sense to me. Despite my current stability, my mind bears the stigmata of prolonged adversity.

A recent Nature article backs this up. It explains, “Depression is associated with a cognitive bias towards negative information and away from positive information. This biased emotion processing may underlie core depression symptoms, including persistent feelings of sadness and a reduced capacity to experience pleasure. The neural mechanisms responsible for this biased emotion processing remain unknown...” Nat. Mental Health 2, 583–592 (2024).

So maybe negativity bias is a scar that I can’t entirely get rid of—but its external appearance can certainly be softened. I know, as I said, that I complain too much. If you’ve struggled with depression for any significant period of time, maybe you do, too. But short of taking a vow of silence, what can we do about it?

Plenty, it seems. Washington Post writer Katherine Kam acknowledges that a certain amount of negativity bias is primal—to survive as a species, we can’t afford to ignore threats. It will always be safer to look out for a lurking tiger than to enjoy a pretty sunset. But if we can’t rid ourselves of negativity altogether, experts recommend that we try to balance it with “conscious positivity.”

To be consciously positive, you have to first notice, without judgment, that you’re moving into complaint mode. Once you do, try ramping up gratitude; it’s almost impossible, I’ve found, to be both depressed and grateful at the same time. Or you can attempt to distract yourself and fool your mood with something overtly pleasurable (although this may not work in the depths of depression).

In short, actively seek out something to smile about—even if the smile feels forced. According to Allyson Pimentel of the UCLA Mindful Awareness Research Center, “Modern science shows that even artificial smiling can activate neural pathways to positive emotions, and release neurotransmitters like dopamine and serotonin, as well as endorphins.”

There are also ways to be a better complainer. You can modulate your vocal tone to eliminate all traces of a whine. Banish terms like “never” and “always” from your vocabulary—they’re surefire signs of cognitive distortion. And above all, try to leaven your conversation with some lighter observations. Oscar Wilde (of all people) advocated for “moderation in all things, including moderation.” No doubt that encompassed complaining.

I realize my history of depression may have impacted me for life, but that doesn’t mean my scars always have to show. The smile I greet you with may be forced, but it’s a genuine attempt to regain my equanimity. And you know what? I’m finding it actually makes me feel better. As the late Vietnamese monk and peace activist Thich Nhat Hanh so wisely observed, “Sometimes your joy is the source of your smile. But sometimes your smile can be the source of your joy.”

Terri Cheney-Blog